Author Archive
Relationship Communication – Is There Such a Thing as Bad Communication
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Effective Communication is good, right? Personally, I believe it’s next to impossible to have a healthy, rewarding relationship without it. Sure, the level of required relationship communication depends on your level of intimacy with the person you are communicating with. But, can open communication ever be destructive, even when the communicator thinks they are providing a helpful message for the recipient? I would say it all boils down to knowing your audience. Think about what you are about to convey, and then try to predict how your recipient is going to react. Is the message sensitive or volatile enough to destroy the relationship you currently have? If so, it’s best to think twice. Sounds simple enough, right?
Take this story, for example. I know a woman that, for her whole life, carried resentment about how her father raised her. This story begins when she was 50 years old and her father was 72. She felt she had not been nurtured and supported as much as she needed when she was growing up. Her father was a “hard-liner”. We all know the type. A man made of mostly discipline and not enough encouragement, keeping his feelings to himself. Something compelled the woman to spill her guts and write her father a letter. In this letter she described how she felt about her relationship with her father. She pointed out many of the shortcomings in her life and how she felt he was the cause of them because she “didn’t get what she needed from him”. She pointed these things out in a very polite manner; obviously assuming her father would understand and feel compassion for her. What actually happened was quite the contrary. The father was very angry after reading her letter and felt he was being attacked. What was once an acceptable relationship was now broken beyond repair. At the time the daughter wrote the letter, she thought it would benefit her to get those things off her chest and didn’t take time to ponder how her father would deal with such things.
The case above could be considered “bad communication” as it damaged the relationship it was meant to improve. Here are some things you might want to consider before initiating a discussion with someone, especially when your message contains sensitive, blaming or potentially negative information.
1. What do you expect to accomplish with your message?
2. Try to predict how your audience will respond. Are you prepared for an unexpected outcome?
3. Is it so important for you to get your message across that it’s worth the risk of breaking the relationship? In some cases it may be, such as a case with a friend or spouse.
4. If you predict that your message may cause undesirable results, you may want to use a good friend or family member as a sounding board, so you can clear your head of your thoughts. Even more so, it can be very beneficial for you to write the person a letter but never deliver it. I believe this works better than spilling your guts to a third party.
5. You can ask advice from a trusted friend or family member (especially if they know the recipient of the message). However, always make the final decision on what to do. Your advisor probably has nothing to lose and may not give you proper advice in the matter.
Relationship communication is important in everyone’s life, whether with friends, family, business associates or complete strangers. For that reason, care should always be taken on how to communicate sensitive information. Can communication be a bad thing? I think it always depends on the circumstances. Sometimes you need to choose to hold back or potentially lose the relationship.
Carl Herkes
http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/communication-in-relationships-is-there-such-a-thing-as-bad-communication-10767.html
How To Improve Communication Skills By Using The Telephone
Posted by: | CommentsHere is another interesting article I recently came across by Dennis Jaylon. Had you ever considered that you could learn how to improve your Communication skill by using the telephone ?
Read on….
Who would not want to create a smart and enchanting persona? And is that possible even on telephones? Yes… It is Possible!
The modern day telephones enable us to do more than we could do with them till some years back. But before we get to that, let us look at some of the features that are there in telephones today Caller ID (CLIP), Voice Mail, LCD screen, call back facilities and many many more. Plus there are added enhancements to make our conversations crystal clear like superb sound quality, digital speakerphone, even stylish designs add the zing factor in our messages.
Now coming to the features of modern telephones and how they help us in creating a charismatic and effective personality over the phone.
Let us start with Caller ID or CLIP facility Caller ID shows us the numbers that are calling us. If the number looks familiar, we can tweak our voice a little to create just the image we have or desire to have in the caller’s perception. For example, if it is from office or from a colleague, you can sound professional and smart. And if it is from a dear one, you can turn down the professionalism and present a softer you.
Then there is ‘Voice Message Recording service’ which enables you to drop a message when the receiver on the other end, is unable to pick up the call. You can record your message by clearly telling your name and the reason for which you called. If you are calling someone who does not know you, you should clearly tell your name (spell it, if required) and leave your contact number. Give a time when you can receive the call back and also give a brief summary for why you called up.
The more clarity you have in your message, the more you create a good impression. And with the help of modern day telephones and their multiple features, utilise all your capabilities to make your mark.
Dennis Jaylon is a renowned business writer who has years of experience in writing technical reviews, product descriptions and product feature analysis of technical gadgets and gizmos. He has won appreciation especially for enlightening people about the latest communication gizmos…the Telephones.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dennis_Jaylon
http://EzineArticles.com/?How-Telephones-Help-You-Improve-Communication-Skills&id=589848
Advice where to go in New York where i can improve my English communication skills.?
Posted by: | CommentsHi everyone! I’m Japanese and planning to go in New York this December. Along w/ my vacation, I want also to improve my English skills. Can someone advice me some good places to go there or what activity should i do. Thank you.
PS
My English level is just normal communication level.
Konnichiwa :] Watashi wa nihongo ga wakarimasu.
If you meanNew York City, I think you could improve your skills simply by spending a day shopping. Theres alot of speaking involved, if you’re with someone else. If you mean the state of New York in general, then I would suggest getting some kind of tour, in a garden or something to that effect. You could learn something new and improve your speaking skills.
Ja matta ne. ♥
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What cases do you have reference to. The only thing I can think is that positive reinforcement would created a greater degree of trust, and thus a opening for more communication between individuals. It is use quite often in the beginning of therapy.
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How can I make my communication effective as IT professional ?
Posted by: | CommentsI have more than 2 years of development experience but facing problems due to communication.
Your value suggestions can help me a lot.
I feel its a big hurdle in my career.
no one can make you learn English,it can be learn’ t by your efforts.so do more and more practice for improving your communication skills.
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Communication Across Cultures is Better With a Whole Brain Approach
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Cross cultural communication is not an exact science. When you begin a cross cultural business conversation for the first time, you cannot be sure where it will end. Within cultures people are different. There are different ways of saying hello within the same cultural group.
Most people do not fully understand the way how differences in cultures impact communication. Some people enter a cross cultural conversation without making any concessions. Some go as far as behaving as if everyone is from their home town.
Other people are excessively studious and read up on specific local habits. They will want standardized answers on what to bring if you are invited to dinner, how to dress, when to arrive, what to say.
How can you prepare for your first intercultural meeting?
Both of these methods have their downfalls. The best way to go into your first cross cultural communication is to be relaxed. Be yourself. Let yourself be very open to meeting this new person. If you take a whole brain approach during to your first meeting, with a non-assuming quient inner confidence, you can expect to have a positive meeting.
Allow your right brain to become very in tune with the other person’s emotions. Does he appear to be at the same place in your relationship as you are? Open yourself up to communication with this other person. Adapt your response to his.
With your left brain, look at the scene from a different perspective. Is this an interactive dialogue? If something seems out of place in your conversation, ask your left brain if there is something you can do to improve communication. Do not go overboard. Let your left brain keep control of your actions.
Appearing warm and communicative, ready to initiate conversation, and doing the appropriate thing for both parties will ensure great communication.
By the way, if you are asked to dinner in a different cultural environment, don’t go overboard. Simple ask your host what would be appropriate to wear, and when to arrive. And then ask their secretary, your hotel concierge, someone local, as to what they would bring to the dinner, what they would wear, when they would arrive.
And remember, a respectful relationship goes down well in all cultures.
Cindy King
http://www.articlesbase.com/international-business-articles/communication-across-cultures-is-better-with-a-whole-brain-approach-707277.html
Does Infidelity Always Mean the End of a Relationship?
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Although infidelity changes a relationship drastically it doesn’t have to mean a break up if that’s not what you want. It isn’t easy to rebuild what you once had but it is possible with the right tools and information.
A cheating mate will devastate not only their partner but in most cases their entire family. Their mate feels a wide range of emotions including but not limited to betrayal, sadness, hurt, loneliness and depression. These things are very hard to overcome and can take a very long time to work through. Forgiving is one thing but forgetting is something else entirely.
The bottom line is you can rebuild the relationship but basically you have to start over from square one. It’s much easier to do with the right set of tools and information because there are so many things you can learn that will help you be successful.
You can learn how to make the changes necessary to rebuild your relationship and make it stronger than ever.
Learn how to stop an argument before it even starts.
Learn how to make your relationship whole again even after an affair.
Learn how Effective Communication can heal old wounds.
Learn a method that is almost like setting the clock back to a previous time.
Learn how to start again fresh.
Learn how words can work like magic in healing your broken relationship.
These are all crucial things that you must get a grip on in order to heal and rebuild your relationship. Like I said earlier, trying to fix a relationship after an affair is a tough road although many take on the challenge every single day. It’s simply a matter of how bad you want it to work.
Scott Sickles
http://www.articlesbase.com/breakup-articles/does-infidelity-always-mean-the-end-of-a-relationship-699487.html
The Art of Communication With Teenagers
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For anyone raising children, learning the art of communication with teenagers is an absolute necessity.
Many of us take good communication for granted and little thought is given to the effective use of communication and all the things this involves.
When it comes to our children, the art of communicating with teenagers is one skill that all parents should develop for a better relationship and happier teenager
The art of Good Communication – Things to Consider
As in good communication with our peers, the art lies not just in how you express yourself verbally, but also your body language and your listening skills, the latter of which is often left out when communicating with teenagers.
Some of us find it difficult to adjust our communication skills from that which is required when our children were in 3rd grade to the firm yet respectful communication that is required when they become teenagers.
Most of us will admit we don’t always get it right so here are a few simple tips on the art of communication with teenagers.
The Art of Communication with Teenagers – Are you Listening?
How many times have you been in conversation with your teenage son or daughter and realized that you’re note really listening? You start of well enough, and at the outset they have your full attention, but before you know it, your mind is elsewhere.
It is all too easy to say ‘I hear you’, but are you really listening – the two really are completely different things!
Your teenager deserves your full attention when communicating, in the same way you expect their full attention. The art of communication is a two way thing – so think about the message you are sending to your teen when it is clear to them they only have half your attention.
The Art of Communication with Teenagers – Validate Your Teens Feelings
When your teen comes home, hating their science teacher, their best friend, or the world in general what they don’t want to hear is ‘No you don’t’. Your teen is expressing a feeling which they need to have validated, not dismissed.
The art of communication with teenagers is allowing them to vent their emotions much in the same way that a counselor allows a client space and a listening ear when they present with a problem.
Try not to dismiss their feelings out of hand, allow your teen to share their feelings with you in their own way within the limits that you set as appropriate behavior.
The Art of Communication with Teenagers – Avoid Criticism
There is many a damaged adult walking around today with parental criticism from their childhood ringing in their ears.
If there is only one thing you take on board about the art of communicating with your teenager it is this – criticize your teens behavior but never your teen.
There is a whole world of difference between ‘what you did was very stupid’ and ‘you are stupid’.
Sentences beginning with ‘why’ or ‘you’ are more like to end up as critical statements that only serve to attack your teen and put them down.
Instead try to get your teen thinking about the consequences of their behavior and choose language aimed at provoking thought. Try to start sentences with ‘I need’, ‘When you’ ‘It makes me feel…’
The Art of Communication with Teenagers – Respect
In the same way that it is important to validate your teen, it is also important that you respect their thoughts, feelings, needs and desires.
By showing them respect, teaches them to respect themselves and in turn respect others. It also teaches them that they matter and have something to offer.
Teens respect boundaries. Be clear with your teen about what you expect from them and what they can expect from you. Ensure they understand there are consequences to their actions and when they go off track ensure the punishment fits the crime.
Don’t make threats you cannot keep.
And Finally…
Praise, Praise and More Praise
From childhood all the way through their teenage years and beyond, your child can never have enough
praise.
When you praise your teen your are nourishing their self worth and raising their self esteem which will in turn help them to grow into a confident adult sure of themselves and their ability to achieve the things they set out to do.
The art of communication with teenagers is a legacy you can pass on. The way you communicate with your teen will dictate the way they communicate with others.
Sacha Tarkovsky
http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/the-art-of-communication-with-teenagers-81341.html